episode 102- UNLICKING YOU - What am i saying yes to?
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Mel: Welcome to Permission to be Human, the podcast. I'm your host, Mel Findlater mother, coach, and curator of Permission to be Human, the company and community. If you're a mum, know a mum, or want to be a mum, and you crave getting out in the world to make a difference, then you're in the right place. This is a space for mums like you to connect with yourself, your purpose, and your big, audacious dreams.
Because when you feel your best, you can better you, your family, and the wider world. Let's do this.
Hey, I am so glad that you're here and I am super excited to introduce you to Unlocking You, a self coaching series. As you know, I'm Mel Findlater, a possibility coach, and in all of my work my aim is to help you move from a space of stuckness and overwhelm into a space of possibility. The [00:01:00] kind of possibility that exists once you're able to truly See it, because when you do, you can step into the incredible impact that you're meant to create in this world.
And one of the most powerful ways I've found to help with that, beyond coaching directly with me, is to give you the right questions to self coach. Because our minds are naturally curious. When we ask ourselves the right questions, ones that invite reflection, challenge assumptions, and open doors, we often discover that we already hold the answers we need.
We just need to create space to hear them. That's exactly what this series is here for. So over the next few episodes, in each episode, I will guide you through a simple but powerful coaching question designed to help you move from feeling stuck to seeing new possibilities. No pressure, no right or wrong answers, just a chance to check in with yourself [00:02:00] and uncover what's next.
So whenever you're ready, take a deep breath, settle in, and let's begin.
Welcome back to Unlocking You, a self coaching series that we are trying out here on the podcast. Over the last few episodes, we've explored what you truly want, what's been holding you back, and what shifts need to happen to create that space for possibility. But here's the thing, if we don't intentionally choose what we allow into our lives, our time, our energy, then the world will choose for us.
So today, we ask, What am I saying yes to? And what am I saying no to? Because your yes and no shape your life more than you might realize.
So as always, let's start by grounding ourselves in this moment. Take a deep breath in [00:03:00] and out. Let your body settle. Have a look around your room. What do you see?
Can you see six different colours? Notice them. Name them.
Now notice your body. How's it feeling right now? Does it feel light or heavy, open or closed, energized or drained, simply notice, no judgment.
Our bodies often know before our mind does. As we move in today's, into today's reflection, keep checking [00:04:00] in. Does a yes feel expansive or tight? Does a no feel like relief or resistance? What does your body feel like in those moments? Let it guide you.
So right now, you're already saying yes to many, many things. Some consciously and some automatically. So let's get curious.
What am I currently saying yes to in my life? Ask yourself that. What am I currently saying yes to in my life? Habits, commitments, relationships, responsibilities, even thought patterns. What fills your time and energy?
What if I [00:05:00] looked at those yeses honestly? Are they aligned with what I truly want?
Which yeses feel light, exciting, expansive, and which feel heavy, draining, or forced?
What would it feel like to say a deeper yes to what really matters to me?
Sometimes we say yes because we think we have to, especially us women. Because we want to please somebody else. But what if you had more choice than you think?
Just as every yes takes up space, every no [00:06:00] also creates space. Right now, whether you realize it or not, you're already saying no to things too. So ask yourself, What am I currently saying no to? Intentionally or unintentionally?
Are you saying no to rest? To creativity? To boundaries? To something you deeply want?
Or maybe you're saying no to things that you don't want. And you've set that boundary.
What if I gave myself permission to say no to things that drain me? That no longer fit, that keep me stuck. What no [00:07:00] would free up the most energy for me right now?
What if saying no wasn't selfish, but necessary?
Sometimes saying no is an act of courage, but what if it's also an act of self trust?
Now, imagine yourself one year from now, living in alignment with what you truly want.
In this future version of your life, you have been intentional with your yeses and your noes.
What are you saying yes to that fills you up? What are you saying no to that has set you free?[00:08:00]
How do you feel in this version of your life?
And what if you started making those choices today?
So your next step is simple. Identify one yes you want to deepen, and one no that will create space for you. Maybe it's saying a deeper yes to rest. To creativity, to stepping into what you truly want. Maybe it's saying no to over committing, to obligations that drain you, to a thought pattern that keeps you small.
Whatever it is, trust yourself.
And I get it. If you've been listening to this episode before these coaching series, you'll know that I've made some pretty big choices. [00:09:00] in the last while, some yeses and some noes. I've said no to a chunk of my work right now in order to say yes to my own space for growth and creativity. I've said yes to stepping in to being an artist, to drawing, to learning to paint, to playing with clay.
And it meant I'd had to say no to other things. No to showing up on social media constantly. No to
the various phone calls that I might have normally taken.
No to some of my motherly expectations. And yes to some of the others.
So, I leave you with those [00:10:00] questions. What are your yeses, and what are your noes, and how do they sit with you right now?
So, as always, if this episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear all about it. What came up for you? Send me a message. Instagram, permission to be human, coaching, but write it down for you even more so than telling me. Write it down for you. Get it out of that brain of yours. Don't let this weigh heavy on you.
Get it out onto something else, whether that's drawing or writing or speaking into a voice memo like I often do. It's about getting it out of your brain, allowing it to release. And then go and share this episode with someone who you think maybe also would like to do this. Maybe you can do it together.
Compare notes. Have [00:11:00] someone to talk to about it with. So in the next episode, we're going to explore a powerful question. Who do I need to become? Because choosing your yeses and nos is only part of the journey. The next step is stepping fully into the identity of the person who lives that life. And then, trust your choices.
You have more power than you think.
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Mel: That is it, folks. This has been Mel Findlater on Permission to Be Human, the podcast, and I am so glad that you have joined us here today and hope that you have taken away some tidbits that will help you go away, connect with your big audacious dream, and make that massive impact in the world that you are dying to make.
If you liked today's episode, please, please, please like it, share it, find Think of one person, think of one person that you think would also like it and [00:12:00] send it on over to them. Let's get this out there and more moms feeling like themselves. Inspired, dreaming big, and out there being them. Please do head on over to find me on Facebook with permission to be human or Instagram or you can even Off me an email and say hello.
Have permission to be human, always, at gmail. com. Say hello and let me know that you listened. What did you like about it? I would love to hear. If you didn't like it, I don't really want to know. Just kidding, you can share that if you want. I would love to know, however. who you are. Let's connect. Let's find out what you want more of.
Yes, I want to hear from you and I want to make it what would be useful to you. As always, remember that you have permission to dream big, permission to feel big, [00:13:00] and permission to be you. You have complete and full permission to be human. Good deal. You do.
