Episode 57 Stella and Sandy
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Speaker 4: Welcome to Permission to be Human, the podcast. I'm your host Mel Findlater mother, coach, and curator of Permission to be Human, the company and community. If you're a mom, know a mom, or want to be a mom, and you crave getting out in the world to make a difference, then you're in the right place. This is a space for moms like you to connect with yourself, your purpose, and your big audacious dreams.
Because when you feel your best, you can better you, your family, and the wider world. Let's do this.
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Happy birthday to us! It is one year since this podcast, Permission to Be Human, the podcast has come into fruition. That's not even counting the trailer that happened a little [00:01:00] while before. I'm so excited that, one, I've made it this far. being consistent every single week. An episode has come out Tuesday morning, 7am PST.
And you know what? I'm so excited that people are listening because I really believe in this message that mothering is what's going to change the world. And you moms and you people mothering with big audacious dreams, we need to support you to be your best self. Right. And to have those big dreams. So thank you so much for showing up and listening to this podcast, whether you've listened since the beginning or this is your very first episode, I am so, so grateful and appreciative for you being here right now.
We have some exciting stuff this week. Every single day, there'll be a podcast episode coming out at 7 a. m. PST. [00:02:00] That's just a crazy amount of work, but it has been so, so worth it to bring this to you at 10 a. m. PST each day, Sunday to Saturday from May 12th, we will be having a Facebook and Insta live with really short, short episodes, but ones that are super tangible where you have a tool to walk away with to help you get over overwhelmed, get over overwhelmed.
Because it's hard to dream big when you're still in survival mode. And let's face it, sometimes we're overwhelmed in this life that is mothering, right? So show up on those. And at the end of the week on Saturday, I am going to be giving away two pretty incredible prizes. I'm going to be giving two coaching packages for possibility coaching where you get to work with [00:03:00] me one to one and look into what your big audacious dream is and how you can get there.
I will support you. I will cheer you on and I am so excited to do just that. So two packages are coming your way. For those people who do the following, you need to like the Facebook page, permission to be human. And if you're on Instagram, you need to get on there and follow us on Instagram, permission to be human coaching.
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So thank you. And yeah, I'm gonna, whoever does two, at least two of those things will be entered into a draw. And on Saturday, I will. Find some magical online tool to pull it out of a hat and see what, see who wins those two coaching packages. I'm going to add another one on and I'm literally just thinking of it right now, which is, I have a beautiful bookshelf behind me.
If you're just listening to audio, you can't see it, but it is lovely and color coded and gets commented on a lot. And I'm going to let you pick your favorite book off my bookshelf and send it to you in the mail. So that's pretty awesome. These books are full of like science backed tool, positive psychology, inspiration, parenting, strength, faith models.
There's so much good stuff up there. So I'm going to send you a book that will be a third prize. So [00:05:00] hooray, hooray, it's one year. Enjoy the podcast for today and we'll see you soon.
/ I'm really excited to share this episode with you today. For the very first time we have a kid coming on our podcast being interviewed about her life and her incredible experience. Unlike any other. We have Stella Zanella and her mum, Sandy, coming on to talk about what it's like for Stella. Who's just about to turn nine just shortly after this release. So happy birthday. Stella.
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/She's the youngest. Child yoga instructor. How amazing is that?
It's so inspirational to listen to Stella. Tell her story. Talk about the benefits of yoga for both her and her mom and for the kids that she works with and to really get an insight of what it's like for a kid to do [00:06:00] something like that. That is. Not done by anybody else yet. So we get this here from Stella and her story, as well as hearing from Sandy and what it's like to be a mom and how we inspire kids like Stella to speak their dreams and to pursue them as well.
So join in. I'm so excited.
Mel: all right. Hi, Stella. Hi. It's so nice to have you here chatting with me and all the moms that want to listen in on this. So thanks for coming. Thank you. I know it's your, your evening there, isn't it? I think you said it was 8 p. m. Yeah. And my early morning. And whereabouts are you?
Stella: I'm in the UAE.
Mel: Wow. Mm hmm.
Is that where you were born?
Stella: No. I was born in Miami. Okay. [00:07:00]
Mel: And what brought you to Dubai?
Stella: My dad got a job here. Huh. Cool. What, when, how old were you when you moved there?
About five, almost six. Brilliant.
Mel: So you've been there for, what, three, four years? Yeah. Nice. Do you like, how do you like it?
Stella: It's okay because It's a bit too hot.
Is it hot? Yeah.
Mel: I've never been, but it's on, it's on the list of places to experience for sure. Brilliant. So, Stella, we brought you on today because you are an incredible young lady, you know? You are How old are you again? You're eight and you're about to turn Nine. Nine. Your birthday's coming out. You were just telling me before we started here that your birthday is just after this is going to come [00:08:00] out, so happy birthday.
Thank you. And you do something that not necessarily every kid does. Do you want to tell us about that?
Stella: Yeah, so I'm the youngest kid's yoga teacher, and I have a certificate and I'm official and I can teach kids yoga. Brilliant. What, what, what brought you to doing that?
So I just loved how much yoga was.
It was so fun and everything. I just enjoyed it doing it so much. So I would wake up almost a lot of days and start doing yoga.
Mel: Yeah, how did you get to know yoga?
Stella: So when I was young, my mom taught me yoga, and then I decided I wanted to be a yoga teacher when I was seven years old. [00:09:00]
Mel: Yeah. And what did you have to do to get a certificate?
Stella: So I had to do 100 pages of questions, like I had to read something or like watch some videos, and then they would ask me some questions. And there were 100 pages, but they were, the pages were a bit long, so they took me a while, like a few months. And then I had to do some workshops to get more, get a certificate, like a full, like more certificates.
Mel: Mm hmm. Wow, that sounds like it was a lot of work.
Stella: Yeah, it was hard.
Mel: It was hard. Yeah, and sometimes the hardest things are the best things in life, though, right? Mm hmm.
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: You must have really wanted it to go through that much work. [00:10:00] What is it about yoga that you like?
Stella: So like, I love about yoga that I can do it anywhere at any time.
I don't need any equipment. I can just do it there. I can stand right there. I can just do it and it can take me as long as I want. I can do it for a few minutes. It's a few, like 10 minutes or something, like 30.
Mel: Mm hmm. Do you have any favorite poses?
Stella: Yeah, my favorite one's camel.
Mel: Ooh, what is camel like? Can you describe it?
Stella: So like, you have to go on your knees, like if you were like, sitting up but on your knees, and then you have to bend back, and your hands would have to touch your hips and bend back, or your hands would have to touch your feet. Mm hmm. Mm hmm.
Mel: Wow, I think I've tried that one before and fallen over.[00:11:00]
You must have a very flexible back, all that practicing you've been doing.
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: Yeah. Awesome. So what does that look like in terms of, in terms of teaching other young kids?
Stella: So like, most of them, like, most of them also fall over, like you.
Mel: Yeah. What kind of ages are they?
Stella: Most of them are like five to nine, five to nine years old.
Mel: What do you think they think about having a kid teacher?
Stella: I just think they have fun. Like, they just like, they don't even notice or anything.
Mel: Yeah, I bet they have tons of fun. [00:12:00] That's brilliant. I know when I was telling my nine year old daughter that you were coming on, she, she kind of looked at me like what?
Really? She does, she teaches the yoga? She was really surprised. Thought it was really amazing.
Brilliant, and like, what is it about yoga that you think, does to help people.
Stella: So like yoga helps you in all different ways. It can help you become physically and mentally more self loved for yourself. It's like you'd be more concentrated on yourself, not what has happened or what will happen. So you just, you know, Be yourself at that time.
Mel: Hmm. So you're just in the moment.
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: Yeah. What does that do for us, do you think?
Stella: So, it stops you from worrying less and [00:13:00] it keeps your mind focused.
Mel: Mm hmm. Yeah. That's amazing. I, I completely agree. And while I might fall over doing yoga, I do still quite enjoy doing it just beside me here, I've got a mat on the floor with a little sign that says, just breathe.
And you're right, those moments where you can just be and shut your mind off for a little while and focus on your body really calm me for the day. Yeah. What, what does the rest of your life look like? What else do you like to do?
Stella: So I do martial art. I know how to knit, and I cook breakfast on weekends.
Mel: Ooh, what do you like to cook?
Stella: Crepes, French food.
Mel: Ooh, with [00:14:00] sugar and lemon in it? What do you like to put in it?
Stella: Vanilla.
Mel: Ooh, interesting. Very nice. And so, I'm really curious of, what do you like to put in it? If we go back to the yoga for a second, how does it, how do you make it fun for the kids?
Stella: So like, I pretend they're doing something like, if I say, do tree pose, for example, I could pretend they're like trying to stay in that position without falling over.
And if they fall over, they have to hold it again for double the amount of time.
Mel: So you make a bit of a game of it?
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: They like that? That's brilliant. That's a great idea. And what's the funnest [00:15:00] poses that you teach the kids?
Stella: Probably
tree pose or bridge or boat maybe? One of those.
Mel: Ooh, what's boat?
Stella: So boat is like, kind of putting your legs and your body in a V shape. Like, keeping your legs up and your body up, like, to make a V shape.
Mel: Mm hmm. Yeah. Brilliant. That sounds fun. And do you rock back and forth sometimes?
Stella: Yeah, so like, you rock them back and forth so they think they're in the ocean.
Ha ha ha
Mel: ha ha. Brilliant. Is there, is it silent when you're doing yoga or is there anything in the background?
Stella: It's kind of noisy when all the kids like laugh and all that stuff.
Mel: Yeah. Is there any [00:16:00] music going or do you like to keep it quiet, full of giggles?
Stella: Sometimes there's music. Like when we do some songs, we put the music, like we put the music and like it makes the kids like.
It's like also a game when we put the music to make them enjoy the yoga more.
Mel: Brilliant. I, I love that. And is there, is, are there any memories, like a time, a moment in yoga that you can remember that was like your favorite memory?
Stella: Maybe when I became a yoga teacher.
Mel: Yeah? What did that feel like?
Stella: Because I was so happy and excited to be like an official yoga teacher, just like my mom.
Mel: Hmm. Yeah. So your mom teaches yoga, too?
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: Mm [00:17:00] hmm. Does she come along when you're teaching the classes?
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: Yeah. Brilliant. Excellent. Yeah. I imagine that you must have felt really proud after doing all of that work and, you know, working so hard towards that certification.
Stella: Yeah. I was really proud of myself when I finished.
Mel: Mm hmm. Brilliant. Brilliant. Mm hmm. And what do you think is the most important thing for kids to learn from practicing yoga?
Stella: That if you fail, you should keep doing it over and over until you're great at it. You can't stop failing until you've completed it.
Mel: Mmm. That's a really important lesson. I feel like all of us in life need to have that lesson, right?
Stella: Yeah, we do.
Mel: Yeah, it's really easy when something is hard and then we don't quite get it right the first time to think, Oh, [00:18:00] I'm not good at that. I want to stop. But you're saying we should keep going. Mm
Stella: hmm.
Mel: Brilliant. And what's the hardest part for you in pursuing this?
Stella: Probably Well, I would say sometimes when, like, the kids wander off, like, they start thinking other things.
Mel: Yep. So trying to keep them focused on that.
Stella: Yeah,
Mel: yeah, yeah, that's tricky. So I work with kids too, and sometimes I'm trying to, I'm trying to work with them on something and they're like, no, and they just wander off the other direction.
So I, it can be difficult to know how to get them back.
Stella: That's true.
Mel: So what do you do?
Stella: So I just like [00:19:00] tell them it's gonna be funner, like if you do this, We can play a game or something, like make it funner.
Mel: Okay. Yeah. That must be quite the challenge to constantly think of how to make yoga more and more fun.
Stella: Yeah.
Mel: Brilliant. And how do you get yourself ready for, you know, you're going into a session and you're thinking we might have some challenges, but it's also going to be lots of fun and giggles. How do you prepare yourself for a yoga session?
Stella: I prepare myself by
like concentrating on the moment and just make sure the kids are enjoying it. Like if they're enjoying, it has to be at least fun to be happy.
Mel: [00:20:00] Yeah. It's really focusing on that. That's brilliant. Excellent. Do you mind if we bring your mom in for a little bit now? Yes.
There's mom. Hi Sandy.
Sandy: Hi.
Thank you. Thank you so much for having me in Stella. Thank you.
Mel: Yeah. Thank you for both of you for joining this podcast. I'm really curious, Sandy, what's that like for you to have Stella, your young daughter say, yeah, I really want to do that as well. Yeah. So honestly
Sandy: it was kind of.
We never thought about it like she was always coming with me anyways like she really enjoyed and she was always next to me she she's very good at it and very connected. Right. So, I am. So, I don't even remember [00:21:00] how did we. think about having the certificate. She was already coming with me. She was already helping me teaching.
Stella: Yes. So
Sandy: it was more like natural. Yeah, exactly. But I, I've always followed her and never pushed her to do anything. You know, like if she wants, she can, now she wants to pursue like the, the adult. She wants to do the 200 hour. Teacher training. Wow. And probably over the summer we will Finish it. We will try it, yeah.
Mel: Wow. What makes you want to do that, Stella?
Stella: Because I want to be a yoga teacher for kids. Adults. And adults.
Huh. Yeah. Because twice the more people is twice the more fun. Yeah. Always.
Mel: Brilliant. Yeah. So do you teach adults and kids as [00:22:00] well Sandy?
Sandy: Yeah. Yeah, I do. I mostly work with moms. And children, but sometimes, you know, I do corporate where I go and teach adults and, and it's nice, but I like to focus more on moms because I'm a mom and I know how stressful it is. So I really want to help mothers, especially when you feel burnout.
And I do yoga, I do holistic ceremonies like full moon ceremonies. A lot of mindfulness as well. Mindful parenting. Why don't you
Stella: let me
Sandy: attend the full moon soon? It's late.
Stella: Right now.
Sandy: Yeah. So yeah. And, and I wrote a children's yoga book as well, inspired in Stella and, and my son, and so that's why I teach children and it's, it's very, it's [00:23:00] fun and they keep me. Alive and on my toes. Yeah.
Mel: It's really beautiful to watch your relationship right now. It's lovely. You know, I can tell that Stella really looks up to you.
And, and everything that you're learning, you're teaching her about, you know, yoga with yoga comes that mindfulness and that, that way of being.
Sandy: Yeah. Yeah. And it's, and it was funny because when she was doing this certification, a lot of times I've told her, you know, what is breathing and why it's so important, but you know, kids, they listen to other people more.
So, With these teachers they were saying and I could see her like really understanding why it is important to breathe How can we breathe? So I was happy that she was doing it listening to other people and not just me, you know, like I'm sorry I know
Mel: Well, I think that happens all the time Stella. That's okay.
But [00:24:00] do you know what you were probably like Watching your mom do that stuff more than listening. So she was like your introduction. I imagine.
Sandy: Yeah Yeah, and I've been doing it since So I got pregnant with her. It, it was when I started actually doing yoga. Oh, wow.
Stella: It's my fault you started. Yeah. You,
Sandy: you were my
I, I had just moved to Miami and I didn't know anyone, so I thought I wanna do something prenatal, like a prenatal class of anything. And I happened to find this prenatal yoga class. So it's like, I'm just going to try it, but I've never done yoga before, but back then. So I really, I really enjoyed, I really, I fell in love.
So I started, and then when she was born, I wanted to find a way to connect with her in a deeper level, you know, like of course, playing and reading books and everything. But I was like, if it helped me so much during my pregnancy and [00:25:00] during my, when I delivery, because it's, it's where, where it helped me the most.
I was so afraid to having like a natural delivery. I was really like having a hard time Throughout this the months when I was doing yoga. We did affirmations. The teacher was a doula and We we were Always repeating affirmations, but everybody knows what to do and all these things So it was very At the end, I tried having her without epidural and anything.
So I went from, I'm so scared. I want to have a C section to I can do it without epidural and anything. So I, I knew it was powerful. So that's when, when she was born I decided to do the certification for children, but in the beginning it was just for me and her, but then of course my friend started asking and I started, you know, in the community, And yeah, it just went like, I really enjoy it.
It was, it was a passion that I didn't know [00:26:00] I had.
Mel: Brilliant. Yeah. And now you're out there working with moms that, that could also benefit the way you did, right?
Sandy: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And, and it's scary sometimes and it's lonely, it can get lonely, especially when you have your first and you don't even know what to do.
We live here in Dubai and most of us, we are expats. It's like 90 percent of us, we are expats. We're basically alone. We don't have family. We don't, we don't have anything. So anyone, so it's very beneficial for them, like to, to at least have some sort of stress relief and just that community, which is so important, that so called village that you don't have when you are back home and your aunt is there or your grandma or your mom.
So yeah, yeah,
Mel: that community is such an important part. That's one of my strongest values as well. I, my kids were born in, in England. I [00:27:00] now live in Canada, but my kids were born in England. So we also didn't have that family surrounding us. You know, they would come out once a year for, you know, two or three weeks, but yeah.
So we had to find our own ways to find that community. Right? Yeah. And we actually did go to baby yoga for a little while with both my kids, but especially my first. And that was really fun. And so I kind of know, I partly know the answer to this, but for those who haven't tried, what's the difference, would you say, either of you can answer this or both, between adult and, and kids yoga?
Sandy: What do you think?
It's definitely, it's playful yoga. It's all about playing yoga. It's all about dancing and props and scarves. They're all
Stella: basically the same.
Sandy: The outcome is the same and the goal is the same. Yes. But you gotta make it [00:28:00] playful. You gotta make it entertaining. And you do have a script, but as Stella was saying, sometimes kids are kids and they don't want to engage or they don't feel like doing it.
Some things that I always tell parents is that the fact that they're there in the room, I never want to pressure the kids to do it. Like they can stay there. You know, I, I have books and things so they can entertain themselves if they don't want to do the, the whatever activity we're doing in the moment, but the fact that they're there and they know that they're in a yoga class, it's helping them create the habit because right now at this age, we want to focus on the habit on knowing that they're going to yoga class to help them improve their well being.
So it's, it's not about like making them do it or like, you know, if you're in another classic ballet or something like that, it's, they're already there and they're already learning, even if they're not looking, they're listening. So let go that stress. I tell them, don't even think about it. You can [00:29:00] do it and they will follow and they will,
Stella: you know,
Sandy: they will.
So, so the main difference is that it's playful, no pressure. We don't focus on perfection. We focus on creating a habit. And then when they're older, then we focus on the, the anatomical like pose and all these things that the, you know, their bodies are growing and, but they do the breathing, they do the meditation, they do everything that the, the outline is the same.
It's just a different approach, completely different approach through music, through, through singing bowls or breathing bowls, you know, the one that expands so it can be more visual for them and tangible.
Mel: That's brilliant. So this question is, both of you will have an answer to this. So the people listening to this, the podcast itself is, is.
Is for for moms, especially, but people who have big audacious dreams, we say. [00:30:00] So I'm really curious what your big dream is. And that question is for both of you.
Sandy: Big, big dream is to have, a brand that goes worldwide and help all the kids in the world, one family at a time. You know that all the kids know what yoga is, know the benefits, and they have the tools to navigate life, the challenges. So they can, when they grow, they will have, you know, all the two kids if they're having.
Problems with the academics or with a friend or in college when they're going to college, they will know what to do because they already learned. So this is one of my main goals. Every family gets at least like something from, from yoga. And you? Brilliant.
Stella: I don't know my goal yet.[00:31:00]
Okay.
Mel: And it might be one bit at a time. You did say you wanted to, you wanted to learn how to teach adults.
Sandy: Yeah, exactly. That's your next goal. Exactly. So that one could be it.
Mel: That one could be it. And that's something you can think about too. You know, big dreams. I'm all for big dreams. And then sometimes, so the word audacious that I use means that they might seem like they're impossible.
Yeah. But, they're not necessarily, and we kind of, once we say them out loud, we're more likely to, to take steps towards them.
Sandy: Exactly. It's like manifesting, right? Yeah. Yeah.
Mel: Yeah, like manifesting. Exactly. So you can reflect on that one, Stella. What your big audacious dream is. Excellent. Okay, so as we finish up here, I'm curious if you, either of you have a tip for, I'm going to actually, actually ask you both slightly differently.
[00:32:00] So for you, Sandy, a tip for the mums listening in terms of, you know, It's how to support their kid to follow their dreams and or maybe both, how to support themselves towards their big audacious dream. And then when your mom's finished, Stella, if, if you have any tips for the kids that might listen in on doing something that is their dream or that is really hard for them that maybe nobody else has done before.
So we'll start with you, Sandy. We'll let, we'll let Stella have a think.
Sandy: So I would say to support kids, first of all, I think we need to invest in, in that connection so we can understand why they want to pursue this and we can help them more because, it's, it's easier sometimes parents don't take the kids seriously because They think, ah, they're just [00:33:00] blah, blah.
If I would have said like, ah, no, Stella, come on. You don't, why you want to do this certification. But I knew how, how much it meant to her because I am really connected to her and I listened to her and I know that she wants to, to to pursue this. So I think the connection is the most important in the first thing.
And then of course, Listen to them and, and know that or explain to them that they have to commit. It's something that if you start, this is going to be the process. Are you ready to do it? Will you be able to commit to this? Et cetera. And for moms who they have a big ambitious goal, I love it. I say just do it.
Just because sometimes we just want to wait to the perfect moment to everything is perfect, and it can years can go by, like, even me, I've been wanting to do not now, [00:34:00] but like the book, I was like, I want to do it. I want to do it. And one time during the pandemic. I was like, I'm just gonna do it and we'll see how it goes.
And it took me a while because it was It was a pandemic of course and I couldn't even sit next to the illustrator so everything took even double the time because it was back and forth email and and it was just it took a longer time but I I say just do it and see what happens don't be afraid just jump and and you'll figure it out later.
Mel: That's brilliant. I love it. What about you, Stella? What would you like to tell the kids listening? A
Stella: tip for the kids, like, for their big dreams is, like, not to give up. Like, if you want to do this, you might be the first, so you have to do it no matter what. If you want to do it, you'll do it because time is ticking.
Not that much. Only [00:35:00] for adults. Yeah.
Mel: Yeah. So just do it, even if you're feeling scared, hey? Yeah. Brilliant. Yeah. Excellent. Well, thank you both so much for staying up late. I'm sure that was a really hard thing for you to do, Stella. Right?
Sandy: Actually, she was very excited. I know. I can
Mel: tell. She's very, you're very excited about it, Stella.
But thank you for doing that and for sharing your message with the world. And anything I can do on my side of the world to spread that further, you just let me know.
Sandy: Yes. No, thank you, Mel. Thank you so much for having us and we're excited and we're excited to hear it right for her birthday. So that's going to be fun.
Thank you very much.
Mel: Brilliant. Thank you.
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Speaker: That is it, folks. This has been Mel Findlater on Permission to Be Human, the podcast, and I am so glad that you have joined us here today and hope that you have taken away some tidbits that will help you go away, connect with your big audacious dream, and make that massive impact in the world that you are dying to make.
If you liked today's episode, please, please, please Like it, share it. Think of one person. Think of one person that you think would also like it and send it on over to them. Let's get this out [00:37:00] there and more moms feeling like themselves. Inspired, Dreaming big and out there. Please do head on over to find me on Facebook with permission to be human or Instagram or you can even Off me an email and say hello.
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