Episode 26 - Slowing down to speed up - how to get moving when you're feeling stuck
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[00:00:00] Hey everybody. I've got a. Podcast with just me again today. And it's a topic that's really dear to my heart and that I've been thinking about a lot lately. And it's around this concept that our world right now feels like we have to keep moving so very fast. And. I don't know about you, but. There was a lot of hard times during the intense part of COVID years. And isolation and all that, but it really forced me to slow down and. I kind of missed that. I don't miss a lot of the other stuff, but the slowing down, I really do.
So this is an episode all about slowing down and is really for you mothers out there who are trying to build that business or that project or that big audacious dream. And are feeling the pressure. And feeling like you're failing because you're not going fast [00:01:00] enough. So this one's for you.
A few years ago. As I festered in my frustration. That we weren't going anywhere. Quote-on-quote in my impact based business at the time. My colleague and dear friend, Lou Shackleton looked at me. She breathed. And had so much patience. She said, Mel, sometimes we need to slow down in order to speed up.
This was not what I wanted to hear. I fought it that's nonsense is what I thought. And at the time I really, really did just not want to hear this. I wanted to feel like I was achieving something I wanted to get moving. I wanted to get something done. I wanted to feel worthy. And in our society of Canada, where I grew up and in the UK, where I lived at the time. Worthiness is definitely tied to achievement. So, what was I achieving? But the look on Lou's face. I have no idea how she holds such patients and composure in such moments. She [00:02:00] helped me feel grounded. She was so confident in what she was saying. It's slowed me down. At the time it was still begrudgingly. But, you know what? We gained clarity and therefore more movement and momentum, not long after that. It's been years since that day. And I've repeated that phrase so many times since both to myself and to the people that I work with. Slow down to speed up. Slow down. To speed up. Slow down to speed up. Over the past couple of years, I've invested thousands of dollars in courses on my personal and business development. And I'm a big believer that these investments are extremely beneficial in terms of giving me the knowledge and the skills and the confidence to move forward. Some have been really incredible and somewhere of a steak, but I don't regret any of it. However, especially when muddy enters the equation, the temptation to speed up intensifies. [00:03:00] I need to earn back the money that I've put in. Perhaps you can relate.
And I'm not wrong.
I do need to earn back these funds and more, but. When that becomes a pressure to move faster and to do more. To be more than it's no longer a belief that is serving me. Inevitably this results in me getting flustered, frustrated. I have thoughts of not enoughness. And trying to move, but standing still it's so frustrating. And it's only when I shift this story and allow myself to move intuitively. That that movement truly begins. The past three weeks in my life have been quite challenging.
It really feels like. I'm moving from one crisis to the other and I need. To take the time to manage each of those. So I haven't been able to sit at my desk and do the things that I've really wanted to do. Have a huge list. [00:04:00] Of things. That I really, really want to be doing.
And. So many things that have gone quote. Quote wrong in my night life in the last little bit. In fact, if I read the list out to you, you would wonder how I'm doing anything else at all. But.
All of that learning that I've done on my courses on mindset, wellness, positive psychology. And this phrase that I've mentioned from my dear friend, Lou Shackleton, to slow down to speed up. It's really built up my resilience. Chris Peterson, who was one of the founders of positive psychology. Defines resilience as struggling.
Well, And this is exactly what I'm doing now.
So, how does this relate to slowing down? Well, because it's in times of challenge that I'm forced to slow down. I have so many things that I want to be doing in my business right now that I was really frustrated for a little bit in wanting to do, but my family needs me. [00:05:00] So I need to slow down. So I do. And, you know, what.
My brain it's still keeps moving in the background. So it's still slowly and intuitively notices the things it needs to notice and answers the questions that I've been percolating in the back of my mind. It's in these last three weeks of doing. Very few tangible outcome things for my business. That I've gained clarity on who it is I want to work with and the impact that I want to make in your lives.
I slowed down and now. In a small bits of time that I'm getting between mothering and managing life. I'm actually moving faster. And with ease this time, not expectation and pressure.
So this episode goes out to all of the mothers out there who have also signed up to so many courses and so many things who learn the stuff and start the action and get stuck. Who forced yourself. [00:06:00] Those who force yourselves to keep going. But you aren't really moving because you keep thinking you have to move fast and the pressure is making you stagnant. This is a shout-out to you and an invitation to slow down. To speed up. The world really needs the impact that you're going to make when you're at your best. And your body and mind know what you need right now. They will get you to your best. I listened to them. And in time. It'll come.